Kolkata’s bustling streets and the enchanting pursuit of love during Durga Puja are intrinsically linked, woven together by serendipity and destiny. Every unexpected turn can lead to a spectacular, never-before-seen pandal or bring you closer to a stranger whose gaze lingers a little too long in the ‘bhog’ (sacred offering) queue. The festive air itself feels like a matchmaker, promising the thrill of a first encounter or a perfectly orchestrated meet-cute. As Navami draws to a close, and the incense from ‘Sandhi Puja’ swirls through the diminishing revelry, a wistful longing might emerge for a romance that never quite took flight. And by Dashami, as the Goddess prepares her departure, one might even experience the silent exit of a Hinge date who had once held such promise.
For generations, Durga Puja has transcended its religious significance to become Kolkata’s quintessential social event. It’s a vibrant stage where young men and women once exchanged shy glances at Maddox Square, or initiated conversations beneath the luminous glow of Ballygunge Cultural’s neon lights. In many ways, it was Bengal’s original social network, a precursor to today’s dating apps.
Dakshindari Youth Durga Puja in South Dum Dum — dedicated to acid attack survivors
While the city evolves and the pandals transform from simple structures into breathtaking, biennale-worthy spectacles, the underlying spirit endures. Parents who once found love amidst puja club activities now see their children swiping right before embarking on their pandal-hopping adventures. Courtship may have shifted from casual ‘adda’ sessions to algorithmic connections, but Durga Puja remains Kolkata’s ultimate backdrop for both traditional and contemporary encounters.
“I vividly recall seeing him for the very first time at a puja pandal,” shares Anisha Shaw (name changed), 57, who met her husband, Ashish Basu (name changed), at Shib Mandir’s puja in 1996. “Puja celebrations were simpler back then. My friends and I would spend hours chatting around the pandal, helping with the bhog, carrying water buckets, and frying ‘beguni’ (aubergine fritters) in huge ‘kadhais’ (utensils). Someone’s cousin would be dispatched to Gariahat for more mustard oil or ‘kasundi’ (mustard sauce). That was the essence of Puja. Ashish and I kept bumping into each other, and a year later, we were married.”
Mishka Basu
In stark contrast, Anisha’s 27-year-old daughter, sous chef Mishka Basu (name changed), found her fiancé on Bumble in 2024. Their romance began with a simple right swipe and a first date on Park Street. While her parents’ love story unfolded amidst intricate ‘alpanas’ and communal meal preparations, Mishka’s blossomed within the confines of an app’s chat window.
Algorithms Before Anjali (Prayers)
“So, in your world, multiplication is the same as division?” This intriguing opening line, sent by 29-year-old engineer Arpan Majumdar to 26-year-old IT-healthcare professional Sailanki Nandy on Tinder, was a clever nod to her microbiology background. “In cell biology, ‘division’ is when a parent cell splits into two daughter cells, which actually multiplies their number,” Sailanki clarifies. “I was instantly charmed,” she laughs. “I had chatted with so many people, but no one had bothered to craft something so clever. Nowadays, people often resort to AI-generated lines.”
Sailanki admitted to dabbling in dating apps like Bumble and OkCupid during her college days, mostly for a fleeting sense of validation, deleting them shortly after. However, during the solitary months of COVID-19 in 2020, she decided to seriously commit to Tinder.
A young woman poses for pictures at a Durga Puja pandal, themed on the ‘Maha Alaye Maa’, in Kolkata
“Arpan was staying with his sister in Jadavpur, and I was in Behala. He’s originally from Barrackpore, but our search radii overlapped, and we matched,” she recounts. Durga Puja, she emphasizes, has always held profound significance for her. “Growing up in a joint family, Puja meant cousins returning to the city, followed by days filled with boisterous festivity.” Their first Puja together was in 2021. “We planned to meet on Ashtami — I in a sari, he in a ‘panjabi’ (kurta). But he came down with food poisoning on Saptami. I told him to rest, but that night he insisted, ‘Chol, North Kolkata te thakur dekhte jai’ – let’s go see the pandals in North Kolkata. I thought he was mad! He traveled all the way from Barrackpore despite being unwell, just to meet me. We queued for one large pandal, but I pointed out, ‘If you need a loo break, we’ll be trapped in this sea of people!’ So we quickly ducked into a nearby café, sitting conveniently close to the restroom, laughing about the whole situation.”
On Dashami morning, they finally went pandal-hopping in South Kolkata, and afterward, Arpan came home to meet her family. “That was our first Puja together,” she says with a smile.
“He is genuinely the kindest person I’ve ever met. His Tinder opening line still brings a silly smile to my face. We’re getting married next year. This Puja, we’ll be back in Kolkata to finalize our wedding plans,” Sailanki adds, her voice full of excitement.
User Behavior
Observing dating patterns during the festive season, Chandni Gaglani, Head of Business for Indian dating app Aisle, notes distinct “pre- and post-festival” surges. “We witness intense intent setting,” she explains. “Users update their bios, refine filters, and even adjust distance or language preferences to curate matches before the celebrations begin. Usage frequency then peaks, followed by a dip once Durga Puja is in full swing, as everyone immerses themselves in family and community. After the festival, there’s a lovely period of reflection.”
Chandni highlights that community-driven festivals exert a unique pull compared to global events like Valentine’s Day. “These moments are deeply cultural and tap into a fundamental sense of identity and belonging,” she states. She also notes that Kolkata shows the highest female participation on the dating app. “The city has always fostered a romantic, intellectual culture where relationships are approached with seriousness. This is evident in how thoughtfully users craft their profiles and conversations,” Chandni remarks.
Aisle’s user base spans ages 18 to 50, with the 26 to 35 demographic being the largest, primarily seeking long-term commitments. “This cohort has typically moved away from their hometowns, established careers, and is now looking for meaningful partnerships on their own terms,” Chandni clarifies. Regarding the technology, she emphasizes that Aisle’s algorithm “takes cues from user activity and adapts accordingly, but the ultimate choice and control always rest with our users.” The app’s ‘For You’ section is curated not just by age or location but by “shared values and interests,” significantly increasing the chances of genuine compatibility rather than merely presenting matches based on broad criteria.
Raja Ravi Varma inspired pandal in Tricone Park
Across Age Groups
Purnendu Guha (name changed), a 38-year-old reporter in Kolkata, has been using dating apps since 2020, following his divorce. “As a reporter, I don’t have much free time for dates, and dating colleagues isn’t ideal,” he explains. “But meeting someone during Puja is different. Over those five festive days, I get to interact with a person thoroughly – I observe how they react to art, how they engage with others, handle transactions with vendors, and even if they’re subtly checking out other people,” he chuckles.
“For me, Puja also makes dating feel safer since everything happens in public spaces. I’ve been doing this annually since 2020. While none of these encounters have yet evolved into a relationship, I’ve made wonderful friends who share my values and passion for art. In a café, time is limited, and conversations often stay superficial. But during Puja, with extended hours and constant immersion in culture and art, I find both of us tend to open up much more.” This year, he already has plans. “I’m meeting my date at a Raja Ravi Varma-themed pandal in Tricone Park,” he shares, a smile spreading across his face. “I already have butterflies!”
Reflecting on how Puja has transformed, 33-year-old software engineers Kaustav and Arjoyita Banerjee recall a different era. Their romance began in 2010, sparked on Orkut. “Back then, you could actually linger in front of a pandal and truly appreciate it,” Kaustav says. “Now, with stampede-like crowds, you barely get a moment to admire the decorations, let alone meet someone new.” After a decade of dating and six years of marriage, the couple now prefers hosting a house party during Puja rather than braving the throngs outside.
Anonymity still plays a crucial role, according to Megha Palit, a 34-year-old event planner and lesbian who primarily connects with women through dating apps. “Hinge might be where the initial ‘hello’ happens,” she explains, “but Puja is where you truly discover if the chemistry is real. You can stroll through Maddox Square at midnight, hold someone’s hand, and no one questions whether you’re just friends or something more.” She vividly remembers her college years, long before the advent of swipes and matches, when Durga Puja offered the only safe space to risk a playful flirtation with another woman. “It’s crowded, anonymous, and strangely protective,” she says. “The city is so absorbed in worshipping the Goddess that it momentarily forgets to scrutinize you. Even now, after an online match, that’s where I bring a date first. Amidst the dazzling lights and the rhythmic ‘dhak’ beats, you can breathe freely and perhaps even fall a little in love.”
Sreejita and Aditya
Sreejita Chakraborty, a 28-year-old entrepreneur, and her 32-year-old husband, Aditya Sengupta, a sales strategist, met on Tinder in 2021. “As a Bengali who grew up in Delhi, Puja for me always meant four intense days at CR Park,” Aditya shares. “Sreejita is from Kolkata, and my first Puja with her was incredibly special,” Aditya recalls. After their marriage, a particular moment stayed with him: “As our flight descended upon the Kolkata skyline, the brilliant lights below felt as though they were speaking directly to me.”
Over the years, as their relationship deepened, Puja has acquired an even richer significance. “It’s no longer just about romantic love,” he explains. “Now, it’s about gently wheeling my 90-year-old grandmother through the pandals, because the sheer joy of discovering new artistry means little unless it’s shared with family,” Aditya smiles.
Kolkata, with its open heart, has always invited mystery and wonder to flourish. Durga Puja captures the essence of its people and continuously elevates the immersive experiences each year. The Goddess arrives and departs, yet she leaves behind a thousand quiet revelations. While apps may initiate conversations today, the true magic still unfolds during those vibrant, feverish nights when Kolkata sheds its inhibitions and embraces pure desire.
Girls click a selfie